Is Body Positivity truly so positive?

There is an interesting TED talk by Amy Cuddy “Your body language may shape who you are” in which she explains power poses to have a positive effect on a person's confidence. In essence if your body takes an assertive position, head high, chest forward, arms raised in V or hands on hips, or even crossed behind the head your behaviour will reflect these too. I would say - fake it till you make it.

This is also known a lot among body language experts – crossed arms over the chest, hunching and making yourself small means feeling less confident or being uncomfortable.

Interestingly enough I found the link here between what I learnt in business schools about body luggage and yoga. Very often in yoga we focus on opening the chest, finding this open posture – teachers even often call it opening the heart area. Isn’t that interesting that in yoga we learn how to get a more confident and open posture. Based on that we can therefore deduce that practicing yoga poses (asanas) prepares us to stand our ground in ‘real life’ beyond the yoga mat.

I could speak a lot about the body and there are so many topics relevant to this subject. Today I want to focus on two movements - body positivity and body neutrality. I think it’s worth noting these two terms and being aware what these two can give us.

Let’s start with the older sister - Body positivity emerged around 10 years ago with the goal to shift from unrealistic feminine beauty standards into a more whole-bodied, realistic approach. Body positivity has been a movement focusing on equality and acceptance for all body types and sizes. One of the goals is to challenge how our society, particularly all forms of media, presents and views the physical human body - instead of believing in only one beauty standard we want to love and appreciate all beauty types. Focus of this movement was to love your body no matter what the form.

I think we definitely can learn from this movement - speaking nicely to ourselves, loving our body parts in whichever size they are but also caring about it - healthy nutrition and movement. It has also shown us how fragile beauty standards are - they can change from super thin to more rounded, same as with hairstyles - fringe is in fashion one year and out the next etc. As much as you can change your hairstyle, it is not so easy to do it with your body type. It’s important to love your body - in terms of speaking nicely to yourself, appreciating it and being considerate of it. Respecting it.

There has been some criticism around body positivity and its obsession about appearances which can result in dangerous diet cultures and unhealthy regimens - people could feel pressured to love their bodies. This way one can simply forget about other important aspects of their life. Our physical appearance should not define who we are.

Body Neutrality movement, which is the younger sister born around 2015. Body neutrality takes a different approach and perspective on the body. Rather than cultivating love and feeling that you have to love your body every day, body neutrality focuses on appreciating what your body can do for you.

The focus is less on the looks but more on looking at the body as the tool we use every day to take us around - I can jump, snowboard, do yoga, give hugs to my loved ones. Looking at your sticking out belly you might want to say - thank you for digesting my food or for bearing children. You can thank your body for taking you places, for giving you the opportunity to live your life happily.

You might not always love your body - you might feel bloated, unattractive or getting a pimple that makes you feel crazy. This is OK. Your body is just your body - you are so much more than that! You are part of the universe and shine just the way you are!

It is important to always listen to your body and whichever it tells you. It’s a constant dialogue - your body will tell you how it feels and you can tell your body how you feel about it. Like in any relationship communication is key!

Today's homework is to take a moment to listen to your body and HEAR what it is saying. Any point of tension, any discomfort, is the body well-rested or tired - you just listen to it!

On the other hand, speak to your body. You can use the following:

I love you

• Just the way you are

I am sorry

• For being unkind to you, for putting my ego above your comfort, for being mean to you

Please forgive me

• For all the bad things I have done to you and treating you unfairly

Thank you

• For always being there for me, for supporting me in my endeavours, for making so many things possible

If you are curious to find out more about this mantra- you can checkout the Hawaiian Prayer for forgiveness Ho’oponopono. I love you, I am sorry, Please forgive me, Thank you can be used for different kinds of communications with yourself but also in relationships with others.